I’ve been thinking about the word and the significance of
the word, “trust,” such a tiny word, but one that means so much and is the
cornerstone of any solid relationship.
Who do YOU trust?
Answer honestly; perhaps I should be more specific. Who have you placed your trust in?
When I was a teenager, I was a counselor at a girl’s
overnight camp in New Hampshire. We use
to play a game which involved trust.
Each one of us had a partner for the game. We would stand in front of our partner with
our backs facing them. We would fall
back and trust that our partner would catch us.
Who do you trust enough to catch you, should you fall?
Deeper still – do you trust yourself? That may sound kind of strange, but think
about it… There have been times in my
own life where I have made unwise decisions that have caused me anguish and
pain. It has made me re-evaluate myself and the decisions I make. I have to rebuild trust in myself by being
wise in the decisions I make and part of that is learning to guard my heart
because I realize that you can also be “too” trusting.
“Above all else,
guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” (Proverbs 4:23)
On the most important level – do you trust God? How do you view Him? As a strong disciplinarian or as a loving,
patient, forgiving Father?
Our individual views on trust are built upon our life
experiences. Honestly I will say that I have both been the recipient of having
trust broken as well as breaking trust.
If you take a hard honest look at your own experiences with trust, what
do you see?
Trust is fragile.
Trust is putting your faith in someone, your confidence in someone. To me trust, friendship and love go hand in
hand. It also sets the foundation for any
future relationships. It is hard to
trust if your trust has been broken in the past. It is only natural to think that if you have
been hurt, you will be hurt again. Like
someone who has been physically abused, and cringes when someone raises their
hand. When trust is broken the wound is
deep and requires healing and restoration.
If you are the person who has broken the trust it requires
self-reflection, why did you do what you did? It requires confession (and I don’t
mean before another individual, I mean between you and God, after all it is a
personal relationship you have with Him and once you have taken responsibility
and gone before the Father, He will guide you on where to go from there and it
will be some direction that puts you on a closer walk with Him and teaches you
in a very personal way, His grace), and then forgiveness. Including the forgiveness of yourself – which
is a crucial part of true repentance.
If you are the recipient of that broken trust, it requires
the same, restoration, healing and forgiving the individual or situation that
caused you pain. Both sides are equally
hard and painful to experience, without God both sides are impossible to
heal. But with God’s help healing and
restoration in time are truly possible.
If we are completely honest with ourselves, we will admit
that there are times when we have missed the mark; times when we have hurt
someone unintentionally and maybe sometimes intentionally. It depends upon your frame of mind, your life
experiences and the type of individual you are.
There is a saying, “hurt people hurt people.” Unless the “hurts” are healed in your life,
unless you face them you either develop a “chip on your shoulder” or build up a
wall that keeps anyone out, even someone who wants to know or love you for who
you really are. Our preconceived ideas
of how an individual is based upon what we’ve experienced in the past, which is
unfair to the person who is the recipient of hurts that have occurred in your
life in the past, and doesn’t give that person a fair chance for you to know
them. You can short change yourself in
coming to know someone who truly wants to know you for you by piling on them
the hurts of past situations or un-trust or building up walls. You can tell if a person really cares about you if they are patient to gently prove to you that there is no need to keep those walls up. This requires patience, love and someone who really is or wants to be a good friend. The proof is in the pudding and good friends are hard to come by, if you have someone like that in your life - count your blessings.
Sometimes we need to take time to heal and recover before we can move
forward.
There are several scriptures that deal with the topic of
trust, particularly and importantly about the Lord, because if you trust in
Him, than the other trusts (yourself and other people) should follow suit, or
the revelation that you need healing for trust issues will be revealed. Perhaps these scriptures will give you (as they
have for me me) food for thought:
“Trust in the Lord
with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding, in all your
ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.” (Proverbs 3:5-6)
“And those who know your name put
their trust in you, for you, O Lord, have not forsaken
those who seek you.” (Psalms 9:10)
“You keep him in perfect peace whose
mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you.” (Isaiah 26:3)
“To the choirmaster. A Psalm of
David. I waited patiently for the Lord; he inclined to me
and heard my cry. He drew me up from the pit of destruction, out of the miry
bog, and set my feet upon a rock, making my steps secure. He put a new song in
my mouth, a song of praise to our God. Many will see and fear, and put their
trust in the Lord. Blessed is the man who makes the Lord his trust, who does not turn to the proud, to those who go
astray after a lie! You have multiplied, O Lord my God,
your wondrous deeds and your thoughts toward us; none can compare with you! I
will proclaim and tell of them, yet they are more than can be told.” (Psalms
40:1-17)
“Blessed is the man who trusts in the
Lord, whose trust is the Lord. He
is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and
does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious
in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.” (Jeremiah 17:7-8)
I have
learned over my time as a prodigal not to judge someone unless I have walked in
their shoes. I have also learned never
to say never because you “never” know where life or your own decisions will take
you. You can easily become the person
you swore you’d never be. It all comes down to trust. Trust in God, trust
in yourself and trust in others. So
again I ask – who do YOU trust? And if
you don’t, what are you doing about it? Food for thought...
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