Hmmm.. Is that YOU walking out the door naked?

More and more I am learning that it is BY GRACE we are saved - through faith and this not of yourselves - it is the GIFT of GOD (Ephesians 2:8).

Throughout these three weeks I've put myself under a "spiritual microscope" and came up lacking.  And then ol' slewfoot and his minions would remind me over and over again of my shortcomings, of my faults, of my lack of my "prodigalness" (if you will) - and then this scripture came to mind.  Then I started thinking - its so easy to get caught up in the things we need to work on within ourselves.  If your honest with yourself - you know what those things are.  With me - They are forever before me. But then comes the realization of something I already knew and its a promise me we have - "That we can be confident of this - that HE who HAS BEGUN a good work in you will carry it through to completion until the day of Christ Jesus" (Philippians 1:6).  Notice that says HE WHO HAS BEGUN A GOOD WORK IN YOU - there is no ME in that.  It is all HIM. I'm so thankful that it is HIM and Not ME.  I have confidence in Jesus.  I know that while I may be the type of person who starts things and doesn't finish them - He always does.  There is peace in that - isn't there?

When you are told you have breast cancer - or maybe any cancer - I'm so new at this I don't begin to speak for others - because its sooo personal.  But the first thing you want to do - is RUN from your body.  Honestly (and forgive my transparency and bluntness) but I wanted to have my breasts cut off - right away.  Even the one that didn't have the tumor. I wanted it GONE. It was hard for me to think about doing my hair - for the same reason.  Why should I? Chemo will make it fall out? That was my line of thought. Its not going to be mine for much longer.  What difference does it make?  But then today, I realized this - Our bodies are a temple unto Him.  Our bodies are not our own.  When we gave our lives over to the Lord and made Him our Lord and Savior - our bodies became HIS. To use as He will.  Its just the "shell" for who we really are inside.  Our spirit.  I am thankful that when we become Born-Again that we are not necessarily given a look at how our life will be.  Because the fact is - its not our lives anymore - they belong to Him.  Does that make sense?  He can write upon our lives whatever "story" He wants.  Because we have given Him the authority (through having free choice) to do so.  Today, I spent agonizing time waiting to hear from the doctor regarding the results to my tests, scans, MRI.  I woke up full of uncertainty and anxiety and yes - even fear.  And that is when it occured to me that I needed to "get dressed" - put on my spiritual armor.  Because the main way that satan attacks us - is through our thought process. I needed to put on my "Helmet of Salvation" - to protect my thoughts, my mind, to focus on my promises - my Word.  I then put on my "Breastplate of righteousness." I think as I indicated that was the hardest part of my armor for me to put on - when I've just wanted to get rid of my breast which has felt like my own body has deceived me.  But they are not mine - they are HIS. Does that make sense? My body is a temple unto Him and while he has given my doctors and surgeons wisdom as to what course I need to go through - I need to not feel as though my body is not my own. Its HIS. The next part of the armor - is the "Belt of Truth" - we need to walk in our promises.  To believe the Word of God. To know that God has given us this spiritual armor for a reason.  You wouldn't necessarily walk out of your house naked would you? ;P  So many of us Christians do.  We need to fully put on our armor  - and walk confidently in the protection of the Lord. I pictured "shodding my feet with the Gospel of peace. And picking up my Sword of the Spirit and my shield of faith." Instead of waiting for the doctor to call ME - trembling, cowering, doubting, fearing - I picked UP the phone and dialed her number myself.  Ready to battle.  Ready to believe. Ready to walk by faith.  I began to praise God and thank Him by faith as I waited to receive a call back. To know that I could (through Christ) take charge! NOT walk in fear.  But praise Him for the victory NOW.  And the wonderful thing about it  - is when my call was returned I was told that they saw nothing to indicate the cancer had spread on my scans.  Hallelujiah!!! I rejoiced!

I'm so thankful for God's mercies, for God's grace. For God's love. I know that I can do nothing in and of myself - and I don't want to. I want to be all about HIM. And I think that is what He wants.  And I think He wants us to realize that it is a lifetime thing with Him.  We are constantly growing, changing - every day of our lives for as long as we have breath in our body.  I thought about how hard it must have been for Jesus (and I know I can't even presume that I know what He went through in the Garden of Gethsemane) but He waited for his fate. He waited to fullfill his purpose.  He anguished about it before the Father in prayer. But He finally said "Not my will but thine."(Luke 22:42) I don't pretend to know what my Savior went through - but I DO know how hard it is waiting. Waiting to hear news, waiting to go through surgery - waiting waiting waiting - what are you waiting for? Maybe there is something for us to learn in the interim of the waiting... There's a lesson there. We use to sing a song in church that had words that followed like this:  "They that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength. They shall mount up like wings of an eagle - they shall run and never faint."(Isaiah 40:31)

Whatever you are going through right now - it may come as a surprise to you - but it doesn't to HIM. Take authority - know that you are a "King's Kid" (no matter your age) and honestly - that the battle is His. He's won it - and so we have the authority to walk in that victory.  And most importantly to remember - that the victory may be ours- but it is ONLY through Him who gave His life for US that we are able. "My strength comes from the Lord.  So when the devil starts taunting you with your faults and weaknesses and yes - sins - you can raise your Shield of Faith and your Sword of the Spirit and say "The Lord is my stength and my shield, my heart trusts in Him" (Psalms 28:7)