I have been hesitating whether or not to share this because it is so personal, but in true “me” fashion I have to be as I’ve always been through my post-cancer walk - transparent and honest because I feel as though I want other Pinks to know it is okay to feel this way in case there is a Pink Sister who feels she is alone. Since cancer, I have gone through bouts of depression and anxiety. Working within a mental health community, I can tell you that I have learned this is a normal reaction to post-cancer life. It is nothing to be ashamed of. If you are a cancer survivor and find that you are experiencing the same – don’t be ashamed or feel embarrassed or less of a person for it. You are (or have) experienced a life threatening disease. Each person’s cancer/post-cancer story differs – but each one’s ramifications radiate throughout one’s post cancer life. YES we are blessed because we have been given a second chance at life, but depending upon what has occurred during your experience – please know that it is okay if you experience bouts of depression and anxiety of what changes have occurred because of your illness. There are a high percentage of pinks (as in the case of myself) who’s marriages did not survive cancer. Even those that are married and have had spouses that have stuck by them experience highs and lows in their relationship because of what has occurred. Cancer puts strains on relationships, unintentionally, but it is part of what happens. Studies have shown that cancer survivors DO go through a PTSD following cancer and certain things can trigger off the remembrance of that experience. For me it is Jolly Ranchers – which I will never eat again, because Dana-Farber kept a big bowl of them for those of us to partake from during chemotherapy because it was supposed to take away the nasty taste that chemo gives off to your taste buds while you are going through treatment. I also cannot stand the smell of lavender (I identify it with chemo) because I was told to sleep with a lavender pillow for relaxation following chemo treatments.