It has now been seven years since I started this blog. How quickly time goes by! We are many members but we are one in the body of Christ. Therefore you do not journey alone! Hopefully through this site you will be encouraged by the fact that many things you are going through in your own walk, others are going through (or have gone through) as well. Sometimes we think we are "going through things alone." But we are not. God said that "He would Never Leave Nor Forsake Us." (Hebrews 13:5) and that "There is Nothing New Under The Sun." (Ecclesiastes 1:9). No man is an island. It's easy to forget that. May the words in this blog help you to think, encourage you in whatever spiritual state you are in and may the Lord use them to help us to grow in Him! He is the Author and Finisher of our faith!

I don’t want any readers to think that I am “promoting” being a prodigal. I definitely am not. But what I am hoping to do – is to encourage those of us who either have had or are currently experiencing a hard time in our walk to be honest about it. Personal conviction is a powerful thing, especially if you truly love the Lord. I think that sometimes the Body of Christ critiques and judges to the point where the person who is at the other end of that pointing finger feels ostracized, alienated and alone. I don't think that that is what Jesus intended. When I read through my Bible - I see a firm yet gentle restoration that Jesus ministered to those around Him. Look at John 21:15-19. When Peter who was at an all time low point in his walk - he was firmly, yet lovingly restored by Jesus. He didn't tear him down, or yell or make him feel any worse then he already did. He spoke to him lovingly and gently - and in doing so, Peter was able to repent and minister in a much more powerful, humble and confident way and it became one of the largest ministries ever.

Please note that I am only a vessel, my calling - to write. I dedicate this blog to the Lord and ask that He use it to reach out and touch whoever needs a special, loving, personal touch from Him. My hope is that the Holy Spirit allows you to see Him through the words (and not me). We go through things so that we can extend our right hand of fellowship behind us to assist and help someone else. Our Bible is the same today, as it was yesterday as it will be tomorrow. (I am far from perfect and do not profess to have all the answers...) but the good news is - Our Heavenly Father does! His love, forgiveness, grace and mercy is real!Nothing you are experiencing in your walk comes as a surprise to Him! May He be glorified through this blog and may God bless you at whatever stage in your walk you are in!~

I am a Breast Cancer Survivor

I am a Breast Cancer Survivor
I was diagnosed with early stage triple negative breast cancer on June 24th, 2010 - I have been cancer free for 7 years now. It was only a chapter in my life - NOT my life, but the impact is one that has changed my life forever. Its important for women to know that 80% of the breast cancer diagnosis come from women who don't have a history of it in their family (My family didn't). Early detection is the key. For more information please click on the pink ribbon above. It could save your life.


February 24, 2015

The Fight

The first blow caught me by surprise. I simply didn’t see it coming…
The force of the blow knocked my head to the left. Another resounding blow turns my head back to the right – like an old fashion typewriter, the carriage flying furiously to the other side.
Stunning me, rendering me helpless; I’ve become a spiritual punching bag.
Unbelievable pain that I can’t seem to rid; can’t seem to get away from; I can’t raise my hands, they lay helpless at my sides.
Raise your hands!” The Holy Spirit cries out in my ear.
“I can’t.” I croak back, feeling as one does with a cracked, swelling fat lip. An upper cut to the chin jerks my head backwards.
Accusations plummet against me. Raining blows all over my mind; but the real pain are the searing blows to my heart which cause me to cry out and stagger backwards.
“Raise your hands! You’ve no protection!” The Holy Spirit cries out again. 
“I can’t!” I moan as the attack relentlessly goes on.  Through the pain I wonder why I haven’t yet passed out?  Where is my relief? Haven’t I yet reached the entitled point of passing out? When will it end? How much can one person take?
“Come on! Raise your hands! I can’t do it for you.” The Holy Spirit calls out again. “Why won’t you protect yourself?”
I lift my battered spirit in the direction I’ve heard the Holy Spirit call, not able to see for my eyes have become swollen shut. I yell out.  “BECAUSE I’M A PRODIGAL! THE FAULT IS MINE.  MINE, MINE, MINE, MINE!” 
The blows become more frantic with each self-proclaimed declaration.
“I deserve this!”  A blow to the right. “It is my fault!”  A jar to the left. I can feel the blood trickling down my left brow. 
“Enough! Though your sins are scarlet He shall make them white as snow!”(Isaiah 1:18) The Holy Spirit booms. “RAISE YOUR HANDS.”
I’m tired. I’m worn. I’m beaten.  I have no strength of my own. My arms feel like led. Slowly, I raise my hands to my face in a spiritual warrior’s stance... Not as a boxer; not as fisticuffs - but palm against palm.
“Now make your way back home!”
I peek out throw swollen eyes, noticing the self-inflicted fighting arena surrounding me.  I try and open my eyes wider to see who my enemy is.  There is no one in the ring, but me. It dawns on me that I have become my own worst enemy. The enemy is ME. I know what I need to do.
I raise my hands to trembling lips.
“Help me Father. I can’t do this by myself.”
“Not by power, nor by might – but by my Spirit.” Says the Lord (Zechariah 4:6)
“I’ve lost my way and I don’t know how to find the way back to you…”
“I am the way, the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me.” (John 14:6)
Gently and lovingly He washed my wounds in His forgiveness and love; and clothed me in His mercy; with His Grace He directed me back to the path I had previously and stupidly left.  The first step was the heaviest but each following step felt lighter and lighter as I realized my steps have always been ordained by Him, how even at my worst moments, He is with me, loving me in spite of myself.  Even during the times when I have become my own "worst" enemy.  The fight is over, the bell goes off ding ding...

And the winner (due to the shed blood of Jesus) is...


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