It has now been seven years since I started this blog. How quickly time goes by! We are many members but we are one in the body of Christ. Therefore you do not journey alone! Hopefully through this site you will be encouraged by the fact that many things you are going through in your own walk, others are going through (or have gone through) as well. Sometimes we think we are "going through things alone." But we are not. God said that "He would Never Leave Nor Forsake Us." (Hebrews 13:5) and that "There is Nothing New Under The Sun." (Ecclesiastes 1:9). No man is an island. It's easy to forget that. May the words in this blog help you to think, encourage you in whatever spiritual state you are in and may the Lord use them to help us to grow in Him! He is the Author and Finisher of our faith!

I don’t want any readers to think that I am “promoting” being a prodigal. I definitely am not. But what I am hoping to do – is to encourage those of us who either have had or are currently experiencing a hard time in our walk to be honest about it. Personal conviction is a powerful thing, especially if you truly love the Lord. I think that sometimes the Body of Christ critiques and judges to the point where the person who is at the other end of that pointing finger feels ostracized, alienated and alone. I don't think that that is what Jesus intended. When I read through my Bible - I see a firm yet gentle restoration that Jesus ministered to those around Him. Look at John 21:15-19. When Peter who was at an all time low point in his walk - he was firmly, yet lovingly restored by Jesus. He didn't tear him down, or yell or make him feel any worse then he already did. He spoke to him lovingly and gently - and in doing so, Peter was able to repent and minister in a much more powerful, humble and confident way and it became one of the largest ministries ever.

Please note that I am only a vessel, my calling - to write. I dedicate this blog to the Lord and ask that He use it to reach out and touch whoever needs a special, loving, personal touch from Him. My hope is that the Holy Spirit allows you to see Him through the words (and not me). We go through things so that we can extend our right hand of fellowship behind us to assist and help someone else. Our Bible is the same today, as it was yesterday as it will be tomorrow. (I am far from perfect and do not profess to have all the answers...) but the good news is - Our Heavenly Father does! His love, forgiveness, grace and mercy is real!Nothing you are experiencing in your walk comes as a surprise to Him! May He be glorified through this blog and may God bless you at whatever stage in your walk you are in!~

I am a Breast Cancer Survivor

I am a Breast Cancer Survivor
I was diagnosed with early stage triple negative breast cancer on June 24th, 2010 - I have been cancer free for 7 years now. It was only a chapter in my life - NOT my life, but the impact is one that has changed my life forever. Its important for women to know that 80% of the breast cancer diagnosis come from women who don't have a history of it in their family (My family didn't). Early detection is the key. For more information please click on the pink ribbon above. It could save your life.


July 14, 2010

Peace! Be STILL!

 I wasn't quite sure what to write about this morning. I woke up with my spirit kind of down. When you are diagnosed with a life threatening illness - I think it just blows you away. One moment your life was going on as normal - the next moment it has totally changed... The disbelief, the shock, the incredibleness of it all is still processing in my mind.  Its only been three weeks - and I'm still incredulous over it all. Tuesday I will have surgery to have a lumpectomy - and shortly thereafter rounds of chemotherapy and later - radiation. Chemotherapy makes some women lose their hair.  I had finally reached a point in my life where I felt "beautiful" where (although I need to lose weight) I felt "confident." I had even come up with a saying - "Sexiness is an Attitude One Wears... I wear it well!"  I had finally come to a point of recognition that sexiness is not a style, its not a weight - its HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT YOURSELF INSIDE.  It had taken me a while to feel that way - and now that is being tested. A woman's hair is her "crown."  If you are a woman - I know you know what I mean. I haven't been a conceited woman - but I finally felt "good" in my skin.  What lesson can I learn about this? I think it is what I've already known - but what society really doesn't promote. That beauty radiates from "inside a person." Although I've been diagnosed with breast cancer - the breast cancer is NOT who I am. Its not "what I've become." Its just something that happened to ME. I'm STILL ME.   They tell you as they prepare you for surgery and chemotherapy to go "wig shopping" before it even happens.  I gotta tell you - I've always thumbed my nose at wigs. EWWW! A wig? Really? COME ON.  I've always taken pride in my curls.  It has taken soooo long for me to accept the fact that I'll never have straight hair (lol) or blond (well - true blond anyhow - LOL).  My breasts have been a good size - after breast feeding three kids, I have felt confident with them (my breasts - not my kids.. Grinz).  Breast cancer really affects so many different sides of a woman.  Although to be honest - I think I'm more upset about the fact I may lose my curls than a portion of my left breast with this lumpectomy.  My mother has raised me to be "A cup half full" person - and as i think of all that has occurred in the last three weeks - I still praise my God.  Because I love Him. I belong to Him.  No matter what - I'm beautiful and special to HIM.  The Bible tells me "He has called me by name. That I am His. When I pass threw the waters He will be with me. They shall not overwhelm me. When I walk through the fire I shall not be burned, the flame shall not consume me. For He is the Lord my God, the Holy One of Israel, my Savior." (Isaiah 43:1-3 - and I personalized it by making it MINE).

Our Father loves us. For who we are - for where we are, for US. He made us. I think about my three children and I think about how I love each one - individually - regardless of their faults.  They are mine! They are precious to me.  There is NOTHING I would not do for them. I would die for them. They are my heart - walking outside my body.  When they hurt - I hurt.  If you are a parent, you know what I mean.  If we feel that way about our children - how much MORE so does God feel about us? He sent His Son to die on the cross for forgiveness of our sins. Jesus gave His life for us.  Why? Because He loves us.  HE LOVES US. The bible says - "If  you, being evil, can give good gifts to your children, how much more so will your Father in Heaven give good gifts to those who ask Him?" (Matthew 7:11)

We are so overly critical of ourselves. Especially as women. Our expectations of ourselves, our homes, our families, our jobs - are all very high and sometimes I think that is a way the enemy attacks our mind if we don't measure up.  How many of us have looked at the "Proverbs 31 woman" and sighed.  Wondering if we will ever be like her?  But you know - I'm thinking she was the same as we are.  Sometimes we forget that the people we read about in the Bible are just that - people.  Like you, like me. Imperfect. And that's okay - as long as our eyes are on Him and we are striving to be all He wants us to be.  I've been reading a book, its called "The Pilgrim's Progress"  the version I'm currently reading is the story retold by Gary D. Schmidt and illustrated by Barry Moser.  It is well done.  And it has me thinking... We are ALL pilgrims. All of us.  The Bible tells us in Ecclesiastes 1:9 "There is nothing new under the sun."  We all journey, we all struggle, we all grow. We are on this "pathway" where we are to walk by faith and not by sight and it isn't always easy. We have to trust HIM. Sometimes along the pathway we just have to take His hand. Hold it firmly and let Him lead us where He wants us to go. Let go and let God.   Today is that kind of day. What do you need to release to Him? Let it GO.  Give it to Him.  See His hand?  Its open wide, palm up - ready to receive whatever you place in it.  Jesus told us that "My yoke is easy, and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:30) or in He said, "Take my yoke upon you and learn from Me. For I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:29-30).  We are so use to saying - "I can handle this Lord. I can do it." I think especially in our American culture we take such pride in "independence." But God wants us to know - we CAN'T do it all ourselves.  He wants us to know that we are dependent upon Him.  And that is not a bad thing. How capable our Father's hands are. Give him what burdens you have - place it in His hands.  I'm going to do the same. Remember what our Father says about worrying. "There for I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink, what you will wear.  Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not  sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your Heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who are you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?" (Matthew 6:25) He continues on in verse 34 to say, "Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself."

Jesus slept during the storm on that sea in Galilee. While everyone else panicked - He was at peace. Is there a storm brewing in your life right now? Keep your eyes focused on the One who commanded, "Peace be still!" (Mark 4:39). Sometimes following a storm - you can see a beautiful rainbow at the end. Let God rebuke the "wind and the rain" in your life. Sometimes I think He is saying that to us - "Peace! Be Still." We only need to listen.

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